Harness the Power of Journaling

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Journaling has been around for centuries and there’s lots of reasons for that. The practice of pausing, reflecting and writing has been proven to reduce stress, increase creativity, and even help you sleep better. Through journaling you can build resilience, learn from your experiences and gain perspective.

The very act of setting time aside for yourself is a powerful expression of self-care. You’re affirming that listening to yourself is important. A deep listening that leads to self-knowledge and self-awareness and that’s hard to get any other way. It gives you clarity in all areas of your life, including decision-making.

I began journaling when I was a teenager. I’d throw myself into it when I was confused or struggling, but once the crisis had passed, I would put it aside. I have lots of journals but most of them are only partially full.

One thing I’ve come to know is that to get the most out of journaling, it’s best to do it regularly. Of course, like most things, when I really need it, like when I’m feeling overwhelmed, conflicted or just not in the mood, is usually when I least want to do it. So, a few years back I began to explore different ways to journal, what gets in the way, and how to set myself up for success.

What can set you up for success?

Incite Actions:

  • Choose a time that works for you. You might choose morning because journaling helps clarify what you need to focus on for that day. Others journal at night to help them unwind. Whatever you choose, schedule it in to your day and stick with it. Set a reminder on your phone.
  • Find a place to write that’s comfortable, calming and where you won’t be interrupted. While this works for most, some prefer a coffee shop or being out in nature.
  • Engage all of your senses. You might want to journal by candlelight, with a cup of tea or coffee, a warm blanket, even music.
  • Put a time limit on it. I recommend 10 to 15 minutes. That might seem short but let’s face it, if it’s any longer than that you’re far less likely to do it.
  • Write regularly. Consistency is key to uncovering all journaling has to offer.

We’re all unique. Do what works for you. Change it up when needed. If routine results in boredom you’re less likely to continue.

The second challenge is to make it meaningful. How you journal is directly linked to what you want to get out of it. Try one, two or all of the approaches below.

Making it meaningful

Incite Actions:

  • Grab 3-5 key questions to ask yourself every day. This keeps you connected to what motivates you and clear on what you want to focus on. Change up the questions as needed. Here’s a few I’ve used:
    • What were my highlights from yesterday?
    • Is there one person or event that I am grateful for in this moment?
    • What would set me up for success today?
    • Is there an empowering belief will help me today?
  • Free writing or stream of consciousness writing. The most popular example of this is Morning Pages from the book, The Artist’s Way. Don’t overthink free writing. Just put down on the page what comes to mind. This puts you in touch with your unedited, uncensored self, and can also release your creativity.
  • Choose a quote, affirmation or scripture and write about what it means to you, how it inspires or challenges you and what difference it could make in your life.
  • Gratitude journals are popular. Research has consistently shown that connecting with what makes you grateful makes you feel better about your life.

Get creative

  • Pick a picture you’ve found or one that you’ve drawn and write about what it means to you
  • Choose a key word from your journal entry and calligraphy it across the page
  • Make a collage
  • Write a poem or haiku

Whatever you do, don’t let your inner critic stop you. Journaling is not about your handwriting, sentence structure or grammar. It doesn’t have to be perfect. Write for an audience of one. Most people choose to never share their journals.

Remember, the self-awareness that is accessible through journaling will support your goals and dreams, help protect you from exhaustion and resentment, and keep you focused on what’s important.

At Incite, I offer coaching and online workshops. If you want to find out more or book an inquiry call please contact me here.

Until next time,

Elizabeth

A pink heart on a lighter pink background. In the middle the sentence "Embracing The Heart of Self Care" runs through.

Embracing the Heart of Self-Care

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Pretty much everyone’s living in a state of overwhelm these days. Maybe you feel stuck, you’re navigating change, or there are just too many demands on you. In response, there are lots of services and products being offered that are connected to self-care, however, most focus on the symptoms and not the underlying cause. Although they might add momentary pleasure to your life, such as face masks and scented candles,  true self-care goes much deeper than that.

I want to take you on a journey to discover the heart of self-care.

It’s not an ‘add on’ to your life but a core foundation for daily living. And it begins with you. This inward focus helps you recognize what will best serve your mental, physical and spiritual health, both now and in the future.

Connecting with the heart of self-care is transformational.

You can begin right now by taking a few minutes to slow things down. Try watching the clouds go by, counting your inhalations and exhalations, or rubbing the palms of your hands together. The important part for any of these actions is to focus ALL of your attention on that one thing. In this way, you’re pushing the pause button on your busy life, even if only for a few minutes, and research shows that this calms your mind and body.

I’ve noticed in my life coaching practice, that when women take the time to pause and listen from this calm place, they often hear their inner voice. What’s your heart saying to you?

Maybe it’s nudging you to take a look at the boundaries you have or the new one’s you need. Or you might want to place more value on your “yes’s” and use them only for those things that are truly important. Are there things you need to stop doing? Is there a courageous conversation you need to have? Do you want to shift your focus?

Give yourself permission to embrace the heart of self-care.

What would truly make a difference for you? Don’t be influenced by others’ choices or your social media scroll.

And don’t let the “should” monsters take control. Your actions don’t have to be big grand gestures. Start small and build. Choosing every day to take the next small step is what will make the difference over time.

Whatever you choose, make sure to put structures and routines in place to support you.  Check-in regularly with yourself – what’re you noticing? What adjustments might you need to make? What new actions are you now ready to take?

There are plenty of proven approaches to assist you along the way, including journaling, walking in nature, practicing gratitude, praying, exercising, and sharing with someone you know and trust.

A thoughtfully crafted self-care journey is foundational to creating the life you want to live. It will support your goals and dreams, protect you from exhaustion and resentment, and keep you focused on what’s important.

If you’d like to talk with me about developing a self-care journey that is transformational please reach out.

I’m here for you,

Elizabeth

Stay Connected!

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Hi,

If you’ve been following me on social media, you’ve probably noticed I’m passionate about connection and community. We’ve never needed both more than we do right now.

But physical distancing, masks and now the cold weather continue to get in the way. Maybe your favourite way of connecting with your community isn’t even open to you right now.

Don’t give up. Connecting is important.

Recent studies at Stanford Medicine showed that people who feel connected to others have lower levels of anxiety and depression and higher self-esteem. They also have greater empathy for others and are more trusting.

In fact, connection has positive impacts on our social, emotional and physical well-being.

So, what can connection even look like today, when it’s more challenging to connect than it ever has been?

Start by connecting with yourself. How are you doing? You’re not alone if you’re feeling anxious, unsure or even angry. We went through a lot in 2020. It’s also OK to not know exactly how you’re feeling about all the loss and uncertainty.

Connecting with yourself could look like taking a few minutes each day to just sit and watch the snow fall or the Christmas lights twinkle. Or spending time reflecting on what you’re grateful for. Or maybe it’s about moving, being physically active, getting outside. Whether it’s one or all of these things, or something completely different, I hope you’ll take the time to do it.

If you’re feeling connected to yourself you’re more likely to want to connect with others.

Depending on the restrictions where you live, connecting might look like a text, a phone call, a zoom call, or a physically distanced walk.

Here’s a few additional ways to keep the social connection going despite the obstacles:

  • mail cards or letters to let people know you’re thinking about them
  • sign up for live online workshops and learn something new
  • participate in a virtual exercise or dance classes and invite a friend to do the same
  • start or join a virtual book club

If this is overwhelming and you’d like some help figuring it out, let’s do it together.

Until next time, stay well and stay connected!

-Elizabeth

say no more often

Creating Balance – 5 Ways to Help You Say No!

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Do you find yourself saying yes to doing things and then wondering how you’re going to add one more thing to your already full life?

Is your life full of busyness but little enjoyment?

Are your relationships negatively impacted because you aren’t making time to spend with those that mean the most to you?

If you answered yes to any of the above, then for you, creating balance probably begins with learning to say no.

“Saying no has always been important,” says William Ury in his book, The Power of a Positive No, “but perhaps never as essential a skill as it is today.”

Saying no means setting limits with yourself and others, at home, at work and in your community. And in this time of high stress and limitless choices, saying no leaves room for a better yes. Creating time in your life for the things that matter.

But even knowing all of this, saying no is still hard for most of us. We want to avoid confrontation and want to be involved. We might not be sure if it’s ok to say no. Or maybe we lack the courage to say no! Sometimes I do.

It is possible to say no and be kind at the same time! Having boundaries doesn’t make you rude or uncaring.

And too many yeses can lead to burnout and I don’t want any of us to go down that road.

5 Ways to Help You Say No:

1. Ask yourself, “Does this align with my purpose and values?” When we allow our purpose and values to inform our decisions, we experience a deeper sense of being fulfilled.

2. Ask yourself, “What will I have to say no to in order to say yes to this?” The truth is we can’t keep adding things to our To Do lists. We have limited time and energy even if we’re living our lives as if this is not true.

3. Ask yourself, “Am I the best person?” Sometimes our desire to help can actually get in the way of someone better suited to the task stepping forward.

4. Remind yourself you don’t have to answer right away. Give yourself permission to say, “Let me think about it”, “I’ll get back to you”, or, “This is too important to make a decision about right now”.

5. Create some quiet time to consider “Is my busyness, my need to say yes, coming from a deeper need that is not being met in my life? “.

Action Incites

1. If you’re not sure what your yes is, sign up for our Monthly Incites Newsletter for a free copy of 5 Steps to Ignite Your Life!

2. If you’re not comfortable saying no practice in front of the mirror or with a trusted friend. Think about how you will phrase your no, so you are ready when it is needed. Maybe it’s something like, “Great idea, it’s just that I’m already committed”. Remember it’s possible to say no and be kind!

3. Brainstorm other ways to protect your time and energy so you can deliver your best yeses.

At Incite, we offer coaching sessions as well as workshops. If you wish to book a coaching session or book a workshop for your next event, retreat or group gathering, please contact us.

Till next time,

Elizabeth